“Giving him your heart to stand on will never make a man out of him, just a taller boy”- Jasmine Mans & Alysia Harris, My 2 favourite poets.
I stumbled on this quote yesterday as I was doing research on these two ladies. Ofcourse, it was one of those “mmmhh” moments. When even the brain itself takes a second to pause and say “wow, I did not think of that…but it makes so much sense” then it does what it does best and rewinds to every single moment, scenario and story that relates. Picking the heart apart and saying: you ought to be a bit more cautious.
I am not going to make this a sexist declaration of how victimised we as women are because I know that vulnerability and self-sacrifice spreads beyond gender barriers. But, what makes us think that giving more will make us receive more? If the world worked that way then we would all be happy and safe. Not to say that we should not give our hearts but I say give cautiously and give where it is nurtured.
We tend to think that we can “change”people, we think that we can “earn” affection, loyalty, commitment or love by sacrificing more of ourselves. The “We” I speak of are the “feelers”of the world, the “We”s that inspired Shakespeare to create the phrase “wearing your heart on your sleeve”. I am one and I have come across some and cupped my aching heart in my hands because we need to balance the war between emotion and logic.
Love is never earned. It is not a wage that you should labour for, it is not a trophy for good behaviour, or a medal for coming first. Love is given freely so how then can you place your heart on an altar as a sacrificial lamb? Perhaps we need to define “love”a bit better and understand what we deserve a bit clearer.
I know women and I know men that have been trampled upon and reduced to ashes only to re-group and continue to be a step ladder for someone to stand taller. Big feet and small hearts – these two should never know eachother. Cherish your heart for out of it stems life and your very breath. Protect your worth and self-respect because it is the very robe that clothes your soul and shields your mind. Whether it is family, a lover, friends, a boss, colleagues, in business, a stranger or even an enemy: Your heart is not something to stand on.
Take responsibility for your wellbeing and guard your soul.
Life is Amazing. Commit to it 🙂