Committing To Life

Committing, Celebrating and Growing through Life


Plight of a Warrior woman

He said to me: “she is a year younger than you, has a son and no family. And yet, she is so much nicer than you.”

My question would’ve been: “If she is so strong and resilient why is she soaking your shoulder with tears and hanging her entire history on a ‘public-broadcast’ line. If I am so weak how come I haven’t choked through my tears and told you of days my mother couldn’t feed us, getting kicked out and seeing death as the most viable solution?”

And yet, as usual I contained the pain and realized my strength had failed me in a relationship, yet again; Not just my un-defeatable strength but my determination and the fact that I have never lost touch with how much my soul is worth – I am a gem.

What is the role of a woman in society, families, business and relationships if we have to assume a lesser position, a victim position a fragile demeanor, in order to be cherished?

I have always been compared to warriors: ‘you are the next Oprah, you should write a book, you’re an inspiration..’ Etc. For the first time in my life I was compared to a woman who was eager to paint the town walls with her struggles and lure a man into her heart by seeming like a damsel in distress.

I’m terribly sorry but I will never release my power in order to be adored. See, just like there are different coloured jelly beans in a packet, there are also different calibres of men and women in the world.

It pains my heart to see a woman downscale on who she is just to suit a man’s whims. We are human beings, actually human becomings, and so we are on a path of constant growth and rediscovery. That path has nothing to do with assuming a lesser position.

The plights of a strong woman are insanely difficult and I have seen it. A challenge to men is to man up and a challenge to women is to woman up. It has nothing to do with downscaling to suit a person’s whims.

Let’s have a great week 🙂

Stay committed.

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One of my friends had me stop dead in my tracks a few days ago. Basically she commented on how strong I am and how I seem to have no faults. I couldn’t stop the stinging in my eyes and surely, the tears welled up and I started sobbing. Again. And I say “again” because somehow this period of weakness crawled through my strong character and unmovable, undefeatable disposition and found my fragile point, then, rested upon it for days. So there I was picking at my faults and questioning my existence, brushing my successes aside and dissecting my failures. Yes I see the good but what about the bad? It’s quite true, we are our own worst enemies and harshest critics. And ofcourse, how we view ourselves will always affect how we force other people to see us. Yes they may have their personal views but we will pluck out their eyes, delete their opinion and insert our own insecurities in their minds and yes force them, to see us through our own eyes. Crazy! But we do it.

So within my wallowing in self pity I asked myself then where this person was that people see and how come she only appears to me in those special moments when the moon is shining just right and is aligned perfectly with my star? The wisdom we preach; the opinions and teachings we share; the seeds we fortify and refreshing water we sprinkle on whithering sprouts: How come we cannot remedy ourselves and be our own teachers? I questioned myself. Why do I say but never do? Hope but never step out in that faith? The simple answer would be that I may be honest with the world but I am never honest with myself. We can never build others until we reinforce ourselves with the same concrete and steel rods that we so happily supply.

Talk is cheap. It builds a weak life not worthy of any breath. The challenge here then is that we know what’s right, we know what’s best for us and everyone around us; We know which path to take but we think speaking about it will suffice. The challenge then is to take action. To stop talking and just do, to stop dreaming and just be.

As seedlings that sprout and start to grow rootlets that anchor themselves in the ground, lets make sure that we are anchoring in the right place and that as we share our sun with our neighbour/s we musn’t forget to pursue our own photoynthesis.

Talk is cheap. It’s time to do. Make your breaths worth taking.

Stay committed 🙂